BLAINESWORLD
#539
1.29.2007

***** see Section 4C for a FANTASTIC FREE OFFER *****

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1. Reflections

A. Cynthia, my beautiful bride, and I seek to establish our own
traditions whenever we can . . . as many of you know, we've
always liked having ice cream together--the key being that
we most often get the very smallest portion possible.

Lately, on the Fridays when I do mediation work for the
City of Trenton, I'll stop on the way home at another of what
has become one of our favorite ice cream places: Cold Stone
Creamery (609.275.5004) in Lawrenceville, NJ . . . the product
is great, and the service is always friendly . . . if you visit and
store manager Lauren Miller is around, make sure you extend
our warmest personal regards.

On Saturday, we went with friends to another of our favorite
locales: Pheasant's Landing (908.281.1288) in Hillsborough, NJ . . . for
those new to BLAINESWORLD, this is the restaurant where Cynthia
and I had our first date . . . I don't think we've ever had a bad meal
there . . . afterwards, we joined other friends for dancing at the
pub downstairs . . . you can also play darts, pool and pinball.

B. The rest of the weekend was not quite the same for me, in that Cynthia
left on Sunday to take a dance course at Kripalu--a meditation/yoga
retreat in Lennox, MA . . . so finding myself all alone, I caught a show
without her (not one of my favorite activities).

What I saw, however, was excellent: BAT BOY: THE MUSICAL at the
Villagers Theatre in Somerset, NJ . . . it is a story that has nothing
to do with any comic book hero you may be familiar with; rather,
it is a drama with humorous elements about a boy who
is left alone in the woods as a baby . . . when he is discovered, many
years later, he is different than the rest of the community--but somehow
he almost manages to fit in . . . I don't want to give too much of the
plot away and even if I did, it wouldn't make that much sense in
written form.

Yet it all manages to come together, thanks to a cast that seemed
to be perfectly cast . . . Jared Picone was outstanding as Bat Boy/Edgar,
and I also liked the work of Howard M. Whitmore who played four
separate rolls . . . when he led everybody in a rendition of "A Joyful
Noise" to open the second act, the whole place rocked . . . Larry
Rothweiler led a talented five piece orchestra that was as good
as any I've heard recently.

GOOD NEWS:
This particular show runs through February 18 . . . do catch if, if you
can . . . for more information, please click:
http://www.villagerstheatre.com

C. During the week, my good friend Kevin kindly invited me to
hear a presentation by Michael Port . . . he's the author of a
bestseller, BOOK YOURSELF SOLD, that is on my list of
upcoming books to read.

After hearing Port, I'm even more anxious to read it . . . his engaging
presentation touched on many of the points raised in the
book's great subtitle: THE FASTEST, EASIEST AND MOST RELIABLE
SYSTEM FOR GETTING CLIENTS THAN YOU CAN HANDLE EVEN IF
YOU HATE MARKETING . . . what a great concept!

Essentially, Port says you can do this by first building a solid
foundation and then establishing trust and credibility . . . only after
you do these two steps can you then begin using basic
marketing strategies.

Here were just a few of the other tidbits of information that I gained
from listening to Port:

* Develop a Red Velvet Policy to help define your ideal client.

* Don't get clients who will drain your energy.

* Likability absolutely affects your success.

* His goal (that should be yours, too): To make better sales that
last longer.

* A key that I like very much: Deliver so much value that you think
you've gone too far and then go further.

* Create a tip sheet or a special report.

* Ask people: Do they want help in achieving something?

For a free chapter from his book and more information, please click:
http://www.bookyourselfsolid.com

D. When Barbaro--this year's Kentucky Derby winner--was
euthanized today, it got me thinking about the public's
reaction . . . everybody was saddened . . . and most
nodded in agreement when reading this quote by
Roy Jackson, one of his co-owners: "We just reached
a point where it was going to be difficult for him to go
on without pain. It was the right decision. It was the
right thing to do."

MY TWO CENTS:
Too bad that this type thinking can't apply to humans as
well . . . I'd be curious to hear your thinking on the matter.

***** BLAINESWORLD BEST AWARD *****
This week, it goes to Elaine--a representative in the Customer Service
Department at Alacer Corp.

She assisted me with a recent purchase I made . . . in doing so,
she was extremely helpful, as well as friendly . . . in addition,
she extended herself to point out another way I could save money;
e.g., by making a slightly larger purchase and getting a break in price
as a result.

Elaine even said she'd send me some extra, free samples of other
products from this fine company.

I've been a longtime Alacer Corp. customer . . . this is the company
where I purchase a product called Emergen C, a juice drink high
in Vitamin C . . . I've used it for many years and I'm not sure if there
is a correlation, but all I know is that I rarely get colds.

For more information, please click:
http://www.alacer.com/

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2. FYI

To help my students prepare for exams, I share with them the
following technique that can be used at any grade level from
elementary up to graduate:

A. Read the chapter. As you read the chapter, write out (don't type
on your computer) the key terms on one side of an index card. Put
the definition and/or answer, if you will, on the back of the index card.

B. Flip through the cards, just like you flipped through flash cards
when you were a kid. The stuff you know goes into a separate pile;
you don't have to keep reviewing it. What you have to study is the
stuff you do NOT know.

C. Read the cards into some recording device that you can listen to
in your car, while exercising, etc. The material might drive you crazy,
but this is another way to help you learn it.

D. Lastly, a few days before the exam, have somebody test you
on the flash cards. Just don't recite what you know about them. Write
out your responses. (The writing them out will help make sure you
know them.) Again, what you don't know or forget, go back and review.

FYI, part 2

* THANKS TO ALL who responded to my recent request
for helping my assistant, Bridget, find a part-time job with
benefits . . . she is starting to get several possibilities, but
has not locked into anything yet . . . so if you still know of
anything in or around Yardley, PA--ideally in a school district or
college with summers off--still continue to let me know.

* MAKE MY DAY DEPARTMENT:
I received the following email from Lou in Florida:

Thank you so much for your kind comments concerning my
book and I was most impressed with the article you put on
your website. You obviously are a very special person who has
the unique ability to captivate an audience with your ability
to communicate with other people. Thank you once again
and you're most kind in your evaluation.

Sincerely,
Lou Holtz
[the legendary football coach]

* Bob in New Jersey:
I can't thank you enough for the tip about Bristol Riverside Theatre
and their incredible current offering: HIS EYE IS ON THE SPARROW.

It is the Ethel Waters story, brought to vivid life by Demetria Joyce Bailey.
What a wonderful evening of brilliant writing (by Larry Parr) and some
of the great songwriters of the 20th century. The songs are memorable
on their own, but they are masterfully woven into the life story of this
amazing woman who started out in the tough, tough streets of Philly
at the turn of the century.

The audience was totally drawn in to this intimate production, directed
by the talented and devoted Susan D. Atlkinson.

The Riverside Theatre is perfect for this moving tribute to a woman
whose career mirrored the struggle of all women and people of color.
YOU MUST SEE IT.

I think many BLAINESWORLD readers were there. It runs through
February 11th.

Here is the link:
http://www.brtstage.org/

* Roger in Canada:
I remember, of course, meeting you last year and thought you might be
interested in the fact that we now have our Communication Assessment
available online. Visit:

http://www.mdctraining.ca

and go to the How do You Really Communicate?
link and check it out . . . you might get your wife to do the same.

* Norean in New York:
Thank you so much for sharing so much insight on Rabbi Glazers's
book [AND GOD CREATED HOPE, an excellent book on grief reviewed
in last week's issue]. I have ordered a copy to give to my mother who is
still having a difficult time with the passing of my father. And thanks
for all your great advice and tips that I get from reading your many
newsletters.

* Jim in Pennsylvania (with an invite):
I know it's short notice but I'm the guest on a live tele-seminar
with my friends at Audio Motivation, Wednesday, January 31
at 9:00 EST.

I'll be sharing some new thoughts and ideas about success and,
specifically, ensuring your financial well being, despite everything
that's going on.

I hope you can join us. Check it out here:
http://www.audiomotivation.com/2007

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3. Back pain

My friend never met a dessert he didn't like, a weakness that was
taking its toll not only on his waistline, but on the rest of him as well.
During a recent visit to visit to a chiropractor for back pain, some x-rays
were taken, a spinal adjustment was made and then the doctor
gave his diagnosis:

Mr. Eichele, the trouble with your back is your front.

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4. Reviews

A. Enjoyed THE PAINTED VEIL, an old-fashioned melodrama based
on the novel by W. Somerset Maugham . . . it is the story of the
relationship between two frosty Brits who discover themselves while
in the cholera-ridden China of the 1920s . . . a bit slow moving at
the start, it soon picks up thanks in large part to the acting of
both Naomi Watts and Edward Norton . . . the accompanying musical
score added to my appreciation of this film . . . rated PG-13.

B. CATCH A FIRE is a real-life political thriller set in South Africa's
turbulent times in the early 1980s . . . it involves a man by the name
of Patrick Chamusso, superbly played by Derek Luke, who wants
to remain above politics so he can spend time with his family . . . yet
when he is falsely arrested for a crime he did not commit, he chooses
to become a member of the activist African National Congress--in large
part to help his country escape from apartheid leadership . . . Tim Robbins
also shines as the man responsible for capturing Chamusso . . . make
sure you watch until the ending; that part is particularly touching . . . it
updates the story and shows a scene of Chamusso playing soccer
with Luke . . . rated PG-13.

C. I've long tried to find the best way to get people to quit smoking . . . not
because I smoke; to the contrary, I've never acquired the habit . . . but
my father smoked all his life, and he paid dearly for his addiction (two
amputations, ten operations, numerous stays in hospitals and nursing
homes, etc.) . . . so in memory of his life, I've vowed to see if there was
something I could do to help others who smoke--and want to quit.

When I came across THE EASY WAY TO STOP SMOKING by Allen
Carr, I started recommending it to others . . . a good friend then took
my advice and read the book . . . he told me it helped him stop his
addiction without any difficulty . . . that's all I had to hear . . . I immediately
went out and bought the book, wanting to see if it could help others.

I truly believe it can!

Carr spends a large part of the book, debunking
every reason that people start . . . one point really struck home . . . he
told of his daughter's wedding and how he couldn't wait for it to end
in order to grab a smoke . . . he also notes:

Watch smokers at an official function where they have to wait for
the loyal toast. Many of them develop weak bladders and have to sneak
off for a quick smoke. That is when you see smoking for the true addiction
that it is. Smokers do not smoke because they enjoy it. They do it
because they are miserable without it.

Furthermore, he points out that most smokers will spend well over
$100,000 in their lifetimes on their addiction . . . and that:

We assume we enjoy cigarettes only because we cannot believe
we would be stupid enough to smoke if we didn't enjoy them. This is why
so much of our smoking is subconscious. If, while smoking every
cigarette, you were aware of the foul fumes going into your lungs and
you had to say to yourself, "This cigarette might just be the one to trigger
cancer in my lungs, even the illusion of enjoyment would go.

As for the argument I too often hear that you might as well smoke
because some folks do and live to ripe old ages, while others die when hit
by a bus, Carr counters by saying that is why you don't walk across the
street blindfolded.

Lastly (SPOILER ALERT because I'm going to give you information
that you might want to read if you're going to get the book), here's a
condensed version of his EASYWAY to quit smoking:

1. Make the solemn vow now and mean it.

2. Smoke that final cigarette consciously, inhale the filth deeply into
your lungs, and ask yourself where the pleasure is.

3. When you extinguish it, do so not with a feeling of I must never
smoke another, or I'm not allowed to smoke another,but with the
feeling of Isn't it great! I'm free! I'm no longer the slave of nicotine! I don't
ever have to put these filthy things in my mouth again.

4. Be aware that for a few days, there will be a little nicotine saboteur
inside your stomach.

5. It is only the doubting and the waiting that make it difficult to quit. So
never doubt your decision; you know it's the right one.

If you now smoke, please do yourself a favor and read
THE EASY WAY TO STOP SMOKING by Allen Carr . . . it will also make
a great gift for any smoker that you know.

***** FANTASTIC FREE OFFER *****
If you're a BLAINESWORLD reader who smokes and would like
a copy of this book, I'd be glad to get it for you . . . all you have to
do is promise you'd read it shortly thereafter . . . (you don't even
have to promise to quit; methinks that would happen automatically).

Just send an email to: bginbc@aol.com and put the following in subject
line: SEND FREE BOOK . . . in the body of your email, make sure
to include your full name and mailing address.

D. Heard FALLING LEAVES by Adeline Yen Mah, the true story
of an unwanted daughter's childhood during the turbulent time
of the revolution in China.

It was very sad, yet surprisingly fascinating . . . also, it made me
have a greater appreciation for the term "dysfunctional family," in that
the author truly grew up in one . . . she also had to contend with a
wicked stepmother that made the one in Cinderella appear kindly
in comparison.

I particularly liked FALLING LEAVES for its insight into the culture
of China at the time, as well as for the fact that it presented an inspiring
story of how one woman could make it in the world despite many
problems that others would find insurmountable.
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5. TV alert

A. AMERICA'S BALLROOM CHALLENGE has six couples
competing for the title of "America's Best" . . . Wednesday at 8 p.m.
on PBS and continuing for the next five weeks . . . make sure you check
local listings since PBS times and dates often vary.

B. Paul Reubens (the former Pee Wee Herman) guests on
30 ROCK, along with Isabella Rosellini . . . Thursday at 9:31 p.m.
on NBC.

C. THE SARAH SILVERMAN SHOW debuts on Thursday at
10:30 p.m. on COMEDY CENTRAL . . . TV GUIDE calls it "a
hilariously free-form sitcom that plays like SEINFELD's saucier
sister."

D. FRIENDS OF GOD: A ROAD TRIP WITH ALEXANDRA PELOSI,
House speaker Nancy Pelosi's daughter, focuses on the emerging
prominence of evangelical Christians throughout the United States . . . THE WALL STREET JOURNAL calls it "a very good
film to watch, rich in atmosphere--she captures the electric quality
of the megachurch--and altogether fascinating . . . Sunday at 2:30 p.m.
on HBO.

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6. Utterly charmed

Walking downtown, I passed an elderly couple holding hands.
Utterly charmed, I commented on how delightful it was to see them
being so tender at their age.

I've been holding her hand when we go out for over 30 years, the
man told me. I have to. If I let go, she shops.

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7. Websites

A. If you're interested in finding out how long you are slated to
live, please click:
http://www.icmarc.org/xp/rc/planning/tools/retirement/longevity.html

I'm good, it appears, to age 88 . . . but now the question is: do I want
to live that long?

B. I'm not tooooo interested in the Super Bowl, in that for me there's
no local team playing . . . yet I'll probably watch for the commercials,
especially since I have given that as an assignment to my Marketing
students.

To those Indianapolis fans with more of a rooting interest, please
view "Peyton Paradise" by clicking:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=tPzGI3JAbs0

For Chicago fans, you can view "Bears opera" at this website:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=sct9igr7wMA

And maybe there will again be another incident such as Janet
Jackson's clearly intentional "flash" in 2004 . . . you can still see it
for yourself by clicking:
http://www.JanetJacksonFlash.com

At the bottom of this webpage, you can even subscribe for FREE to
THIS IS TRUE--one of my favorite online publications.

C. BLAINESWORLD, the website, remains up and running . . . to view
it, please click:
http://www.blainesworld.net

THANKS to the efforts of Lori Hansen, my ace webmaster, you can
find past issues of this newsletter by going to the above website, then
clicking on "Newsletter" to the left, followed by "Past issues" . . . best
of all, you can now easily skip from one section to the next.

MR. CURIOUS HERE:
Would you like that option for every issue--even the current one . . . if
you're not sure what I'm referring to, please take a look at last
week's issue:
http://www.blainesworld.net/newsletter/01.22.2007_538.asp

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8. Computer tip

Sometimes, when online, I get too impatient; e.g., when the
dreaded hourglass appears . . . if I can't get it to too quickly
end, I just shut down the computer and start it up again . . . but
that often takes a long time and, at times, even causes me to
lose stuff that I may have been working on.

Another approach: Just leave everything alone for a few minutes . . . in
fact, walk away from your computer, then come back to it . . . about
half the time, the hour glass disappears, and I can resume working on
whatever thing I was working on before it appeared.

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9. Student excuses

* "I will be unable to be in class today because every year we have
a Jell-O wrestling competition on campus, and it has just come
to my attention that the 50 gallons of Jell-O that we previously made
has spoiled. So now I have to remake the 50 gallons before 9 o'clock
tonight. . . . I understand this is a really weird circumstance, but without
the Jell-O we have no competition, and without the competition we lose
all of our fund-raising. Thank you and have a good weekend."

* I had a student who needed to be excused because she was donating
her eggs to her aunt. I'm 99 percent sure it was legit, however. Who
would make something like that up?

* "I'm not interested in the subject of this seminar, and therefore unlikely
to answer an essay or exam question on it. I didn't really see the point
in bothering to prepare for it."

* My favorite excuse from a student for "why I didn't do my homework" was
"because I was bitten by a shark." He was a surfer, and his hand was
bandaged up, too. It was nasty!

* A student vanishes for three weeks with no word. At the midterm, he
shows up, takes the test, and sticks around after to chat. He tells me
he got "crabs, but not from . . . you know. You see, I bought this old
mattress" and "I didn't want to accidentally infect anyone in the class."

* "You haven't seen me before, but I'm in this class. I'm taking 24 credit
hours this quarter because I'm trying to graduate. I just wanted to let you
know. It's just that your class is my lowest priority right now. I have a direct
time conflict, and the other class is more interesting. Is that going
to be a problem?"

* "Sorry I missed class, professor, but I had to stay with my girlfriend
while she was getting her hair cut."

* A student of mine recently floored me with this excuse. He was one
of four students who had done a group project. He had drawn the short
straw and was responsible for typing it and turning it in. He showed up
a day late and told me that he had it done in time, but that he'd stuck
it in the arm of his tiger costume—he's the college mascot—and forgot
it there, unable to retrieve it for two days because it was locked
in the sports department offices.

* Another professor reports a colleague's all-time favorite excuse: The
student had missed the exam, he said in an apologetic e-mail message,
because he was "incredulously sick."

SOURCE:
Adapted from "Short subjects" by Don Troop,
THE CHRONICLE OF HIGHER EDUCATION, 1.19.07, p. A4

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10. A quote I like

People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but
people will never forget how you made them feel.--Maya Angelou,
American poet, educator, historian, best-selling author, actress,
playwright, civil-rights activist, producer, and director . . . for more
information about this remarkable woman, please click her picture at:
http://www.mayaangelou.com/

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11. Thought for the day

Wet pants

Come with me to a third grade classroom . . .

There is a nine-year-old kid sitting at his desk and all of a sudden,
there is a puddle between his feet and the front of his pants are wet.
He thinks his heart is going to stop because he cannot possibly imagine
how this has happened. It's never happened before, and he knows that
when the boys find out he will never hear the end of it. When the girls
find out, they'll never speak to him again as long as he lives.

The boy believes his heart is going to stop; he puts his head down
and prays this prayer, "Dear God, this is an emergency. I need help now!
Five minutes from now I'm dead meat."

He looks up from his prayer and here comes the teacher with a look
in her eyes that says he has been discovered.

As the teacher is walking toward him, a classmate named Susie
is carrying a goldfish bowl that is filled with water. Susie trips in front
of the teacher and inexplicably dumps the bowl of water in the boy's lap.

The boy pretends to be angry, but all the while is saying to himself,
"Thank you, Lord! Thank you, Lord!"

Now all of a sudden, instead of being the object of ridicule, the boy is
the object of sympathy. The teacher rushes him downstairs and
gives him gym shorts to put on while his pants dry out. All the other
children are on their hands and knees cleaning up around his desk.
The sympathy is wonderful. But as life would have it, the ridicule that
should have been his has been transferred to someone else--Susie.

She tries to help, but they tell her to get out: "You've done enough,
you klutz!"

Finally, at the end of the day, as they are waiting for the bus, the boy
walks over to Susie and whispers, "You did that on purpose, didn't you?"

Susie whispers back, "I wet my pants once too."

May God help us see the opportunities that are always around us
to do good. Remember . . . just going to church doesn't make you
a Christian any more than standing in your garage makes you a car.

I not only love the story, I love that last quote! I only hope that
in the coming years there will be many people with fish bowls
around me!!

Live simply.
Love generously.
Care deeply.
Speak kindly.
Leave the rest to God.

Author Unknown
(if you know who wrote this and/or the source, please let me know)

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12. Advance planning department

A. Cynthia (see also Section 1A) will next be running her fantastic
Move Your Body classes on the following dates

Saturday, February 3, at 1:30 p.m. . . . FREE; and
Saturday, February 10, at 1:30 p.m. . . . FREE.

All sessions are at the Princeton Center for Yoga & Health
in Skillman, NJ.

For more information, please click:
http://www.princetonyoga.com/

or call 609.924.7294.

A guarantee: You will be delighted if you attend any and/or
all of the above!

B. Come by my guest:
* When I speak on "Positioning: How to Differentiate
Yourself from the Competition" on Tuesday, Feb. 6, at Bucks County
Community College . . . location: Penn 410 . . . if you attend, you'll
learn the difference between a left-handed and right-handed pencil.
(I kid you not!)

Please email me at bginbc@aol.com if you'll be attending, so that
I can notify you if there were any last minute change in plans.

* Or take advantage of this generous offer from Jim in Pennsylvania
to hear me:

As our semester gets underway, I would like to take this opportunity to invite
you to the Spring 2007 Faculty Gathering at the Bristol Center on Monday,
February 12th at 5:30 p.m.

I am pleased to inform you that our guest will be BCCC Professor and
Lindback Award Recipient, Blaine Greenfield, who will be speaking
on the topic of "Creativity and Engagement in the Classroom."
(See the link below.)
http://www.bucks.edu/lbc/bg.swf

While the program will not officially begin until 5:30, a light buffet will
be available starting at 5:15 p.m. You are more than welcome to join
us at anytime upon your arrival to campus that evening. Our program
will conclude at 6:30 p.m. for the convenience of our Monday night
instructors.

Please RSVP via email at sellj@bucks.edu , by phone at 215.781.3939,
or by using the enclosed form at the above link by February 7th.

Come relax and enjoy an intriguing presentation by our colleague,
Blaine Greenfield.

C. Natalie in Pennsylvania:
If you happen to know any widowed men, please invite them
to my Sunday, Feb.18 get-together for widows and widowers. It's at my
house (420 Belmont Avenue, Doylestown PA 18901) from 3-5 p.m.
Refreshments are provided and the admission is $10. We'll have a short
discussion on the topic: "What is the hardest part of being widowed
for you?"

Women are obviously invited, too.

For more information, call Gayle Crist at 215.489.0225.

D. HOLD THIS DATE:
Harry Paul, co-author of REVVED! and FISH!, will be speaking
at Bucks County Community College on March 12, 2007 at the annual
"Meet the Author" Business Seminar . . . you won't want to miss him;
he is great.

Fulton Bank (Premier Division) has graciously stepped forward as
the Presenting Sponsor . . . but there are still several opportunities
for other corporate sponsors for this outstanding event, so if you'd
like more information, call the Foundation Office at 215.968.8224.

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PS. Please join me in praying that we soon get our remaining soldiers
back from Iraq and that peace soon resumes in Israel . . . also, make it
a great week!

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