|
|
|
BLAINESWORLD
#582 11.26.2007 In this issue: 1. Reflections 2. FYI 3. All you need to do is ask 4. Reviews . . . AUGUST RUSH, etc. 5. TV alert 6. It takes all kinds 7. Websites 8. Computer tip 9. New procedures 10. A quote I like 11. Thought for the day 12. Advance planning department _________________________________________________________ 1. Reflections A. Cynthia, my beautiful bride, and I celebrated our first Thanksgiving without any of our parents being around to join us . . . so we missed them, but appreciated being able to join other loved ones at the home of Cynthia's sister and brother-in-law, Joyce and Marty . . . as always, the food was both plentiful and delicious. B. Saturday, we went with our friends Gail and Mark to Atlantic City . . . that's the four of us below (l-r) Gail, Mark, Cynthia, and yours truly:  At night, we had as fine a dinner as we've ever had at Dock's Oyster House (609.345.0092) . . . I'm ordinarily not a fish eater, but I tried and thoroughly enjoyed the baramundi dish . . . Cynthia liked her pan roasted halibut, and both Gail and Mark said their pecan salmon was superb . . . service by Will, our waiter, was outstanding. From there, we went to see LEGENDS IN CONCERT at Resorts . . . all the tribute artists were talented: Michael Jackson, Marilyn Monroe, Liza Minelli, Elvis, and Jay Leno . . . the latter had perhaps the funniest line of the evening when he commented that "a teacher got arrested for having sex with a high school student . . . I was lucky if I got to bang the erasers!" We stayed overnight at the Wyndham Skyline Tower, a time-sharing property that Mark and Gail have access to . . . it was nice . . . so were the massages we got the next morning. Yet perhaps the thing we'll remember most was the walk that we all got to take on the boardwalk . . . we saw an amazing site: hundreds of strays cats at what could be best described as their very own campground . . . it seems that people take care of them throughout the year, bringing them food on a regular basis . . . they even had their own blankets and toys . . . and though they seemed to be in relatively good shape, it made us realize how fortunate our cats are to have a good home--and for us to have them as part of our home! C. CONGRATULATIONS to Josh Rubinsky, the fantastic lawyer for our teacher's union at Bucks County Community College . . . he just helped employees at Total Health Home Care Corp. win a $2.2 million settlement . . . for more information, please click:http://www.emailthis.clickability.com/et/emailThis?clickMap=viewThis&etMailToID=597058322 D. I realize not everybody reads every issue from top to bottom, but that said, I urge you NOT to skip over Section 7A in this week's issue . . . this is a website that you will long remember, and it will make you appreciate all that you have in life! ***** BLAINESWORLD BEST AWARD ***** This week, it goes to Ryan Feeney--an employee at Maggie Moo's in Hillsborough, NJ. Ryan has a winning smile when she scoops ice cream and makes you feel welcome every time you come into the store. However, I was most impressed by something she did a few weeks ago . . . seems a mother brought her daughter in, along with a friend . . . turns out the friend got sick, rushed to the bathroom and did her thing. The mother just sat by and watched, in essence doing nothing . . . so Ryan helped the young girl out, cleaned her up and even gave her a clean shirt to wear (Ryan's Maggie Moo shirt) . .. what's more, she didn't complain about the event at all; in fact, she even laughed it off and replied to me, she just did what "needed to be done." Back To Top _________________________________________________________ 2. FYI In an attempt to make all BLAINESWORLD readers feel better, here's a different way of looking at one of the world's great mysteries: The missing sock experience. "The washer ate one of my socks," we say. Or "There must be a miniature black hole in the dryer." Or "One of my socks escaped during the night." There is another way to look at this. A visiting friend transferred my laundry from out of my dryer onto the folding table, sorted my clothes, found one sock left over, and exclaimed, "Look! Your dryer made an extra sock for you. When it makes another one, you'll have a new pair. You're not behind, you're ahead!" Oh. Well. Yes. A new view of the mysterious workings of the dryer. Now I approach it eagerly anticipating spontaneous conception. I need one more brown sock. SOURCE: WHAT ON EARTH HAVE I DONE? (see also Sections 4C, 10 and 11) by Robert Fulghum FYI, part 2 * Lee in Pennsylvania: There is a very friendly cat that has become the neighborhood pet in my area. I live in the Fox Chase section of Northeast Philadelphia. This cat must have belonged to someone at some point because he is extremely friendly. One of my neighbors took him to the vet and the cast is apparently is 4 years old and healthy. I would love to find him a home before the winter sets in. Unfortunately I have a male cat that is very territorial so I can't bring him in. If anyone is interested in this beautiful animal, please email me at leepwhite@comcast.net. * Linda in Pennsylvania: Below is an interesting article/website . . . perhaps for BLAINESWORLD? According to the website, "So you want to give . . . nothing to your loved ones this holiday season? Or at least nothing that'll end up on a dusty shelf or in a landfill? Consider these stuff-free gift alternatives." http://www.grist.org/feature/2007/11/20/stuff-free/?source=most_popular
* Kelly in Pennsylvania: I loved reading your newsletter. Coincidentally, I grew up in Bucks County and live in Newtown, not too terribly far from BCCC. I also have wonderful childhood memories of Foster's Toy and Cycle Shop (as it was called back then) in Doylestown. It was always the BEST Halloween store around, not to mention the place my parents bought me my first two-wheeler bike. Foster's has moved locations a couple of times, but I can still remember every room of building they occupied in the late 70s. Thanks for the trip down memory lane! * Kathy in Florida: I think our movie senior discount starts at 50. I sometimes ask: Do you offer a senior discount? If they say yes at 65, I say, ooops, gotta wait. Sometimes they just give it to me without asking age. It never hurts to ask. * Kevin in Pennsylvania: Catalog Choice is an easy, free service that allows you to decline unsolicited catalogs, reducing the number of catalogs in your mailbox and the number of trees that get sent to the paper mill. Join me by clicking the link below: http://www.catalogchoice.org/signup
* Roger in New York [commenting on computer problems]: Or get a Macintosh! I have both Mac and Windows XP. You just don't know what you're missing, using Windows stone knives and bearskins instead of a Mac. * Bill in Pennsylvania: My wife says it is rude to point out typos . . . but I cannot help myself. As you know, I love movies, and I do not get a chance to see that many. I saw FRED CLAUS with my son and thought that the movie was sure to be an instant Christmas classic. It reminded me of ELF with Will Ferrell. The cast was outstanding . . . Vince Vaughn, Paul Giamatti, Kevin Spacey and Kathy Bates was as outstanding as Mother Claus. However, Vaughn (as Fred) was Santa's big brother--NOT his little one. * Jack in Pennsylvania also picked up the same error: I hate to tell you this, but I found an error in the BLAINESWORLD review section. Fred Claus is the "older" brother not the younger. I saw it twice so far so I know that "piece of history!" Back To Top _________________________________________________________ 3. All you need to do is ask While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, my friend (a police officer) was interrupted by a little boy about 6 years old. Looking up and down at her uniform, he asked, "Are you a cop?" "Yes," my friend answered and continued writing the report. "My mother said if I ever needed help I should ask the police. Is that right?" "Yes, that's right," my friend again answered. "Well, then," he said as he extended his foot, "would you please tie my shoe?" Back To Top _________________________________________________________ 4. Reviews A. Saw AUGUST RUSH, a schmaltzy drama about a talented orphan who finds his parents as a result of his musical talents . . . the music is OK and so is the acting (except for an over-the-top Robin Williams), but I just didn't get into the story until the very ending . . . the film finally comes alive then, but not enough so that I'd recommend that you rush out to go see it . . . rated PG. MY TWO CENTS: The above reminded me of part of an essay that Cynthia's nephew Benjamin wrote as part of his application to transfer into UCLA . . . he wrote this, by the way, before AUGUST RUSH came out: Music allows me to express myself. Throughout my academic life, as I struggled to be understood by teachers and peers, instruments became my outlet for succinctly communicating my feelings. Nothing else in my world could help me understand or express so much joy, so much pain, and everything in between. Colors swirled through my mind's landscape as I stood on the phone book conducting symphonies on the record player before elementary school. It made sense; everything was in its right place. As I walked outside, the music continued. Birds, cars, wind blowing through trees, the rhythm of people's feet hitting the ground as they walked; this was music. All of these sounds collaborated to make beautiful, seamless transitions from one movement to the next. B. WAITRESS is now out in DVD format . . . my review from BLAINESWORLD #554 follows: Finally! . . . after seeing far too many films that had good reviews, but were terrible (YEAR OF THE DOG being the most recent instance), I came across WAITRESS . . . critics loved this one; I did too. It is a sweet and quirky tale of a small town woman stuck in a lousy marriage whose life changes when she becomes pregnant . . . Keri Russell is terrific in the leading role, and it was good to see Andy Griffith back on screen . . . rated PG-13. C. Robert Fulghum has long been one of my favorite authors . . . ever since he came out with ALL I REALLY NEED TO KNOW I LEARNED IN KINDERGARTEN, I've made it a point to get everything he has written. They each contain essays that look at everyday situations in a way that will delight you and, also, make you think . . . his latest, WHAT ON EARTH HAVE I DONE? (see also Sections 2, 10 and 11) is no exception. Fulghum begins by telling of an experience he had when he heard a mother asking a variation of the book's title question of her son: "Billy, what on Earth have you done?" . . . he then realized that his mother had asked the same question, and he then asked his own children, who no doubt have asked their kids. Yet as he finds out, the answer is never easy and almost always surprising . . . in one of the best passages of the book, he describes an encounter he had with a particular store's employee . . . when something was not ready when promised, he didn't get upset; rather, he played a game to see if the person could come up with a really creative excuse as to why this happened. This playfulness is described via several other encounters that Fulghum has as he moves among Seattle, Utah and Crete . . . for example: * There's a tailor shop on Queen Anne Avenue. Sign in the window says ALTERATIONS AND REPAIRS FOR MEN AND WOMEN. The tailor is standing in the doorway. I stop. "I'd like to get altered and repaired," I say. She looks at me cautiously. Goes inside. Closes the door. Not a player. I also liked this other approach he describes: * A friend of mine simply waves and smiles at people he doesn't know. More often than not, they wave and smile back. Or ask, "Do I know you?" and he responds, "No, but you could." As to what it (life) all means, Fulghum perhaps sums it up best with this tidbit: * The old man looked mildly outraged and fell into high-gear Greek again with his son. The son was apologetic. "Pardon me, but my father says that it is a lie that Americans have everything. You have no sheep, no goats, no trees, no oil, no vines, no wine, not even chickens. He asks, 'What kind of life is that?' He says, 'No wonder you don't sing or dance or recite poetry very often.' He is dismayed." If you'd like to become less dismayed, buy WHAT ON EARTH HAVE I DONE? for the upcoming holiday season . . . it will make an ideal gift for just about anybody on your list . . . yet make sure you treat yourself, too, with your very own copy. D. I'm a big John Grisham fan, in part because he takes chances with his writing . . . initially, he just wrote legal thrillers that I enjoyed . . . but lately, he has veered away from such books. In 2006, he came out with what I think was his first non-fiction book (AN INNOCENT MAN), and he followed it up with 2007's PLAYING FOR PIZZA--a title I just heard via a CD version. It is the story of a third-string Cleveland Browns quarterback who becomes the greatest goat in sports history when his three interceptions cost his team a victory in the closing minutes of an AFC championship game . . . to escape, he finds refuge by playing football in Italy where the crowds are small and the pay is poor. Yet as you might imagine, he finds success here and won't even break his contract even when he has the opportunity to do so for much more money in Canada . . . I found the details of the games leading up the Italian Superbowl quite interesting and actually found myself rooting for the Parma Panthers . . . in addition, I liked the details of life in Italy; it almost felt as if I was listening to a travel guide. Only the romance toward the end was disappointing because it seems to have been thrown in as an afterthought. Back To Top _________________________________________________________ 5. TV alert A. RADIO CITY MUSIC HALL'S 75TH ANNIVERSARY SPECIAL airs on Saturday at 8 p.m. on NBC . . . as a kid, I used to go there every Christmas . . . if you've never had the experience, watch to see such yearly crowd-pleasers as Rockettes, the Parade of the Wooden Soldiers and the Living Nativity. B. MR. WARMTH: THE DON RICKLES PROJECT profiles the insult comic, who is interviewed and seen performing in his current Las Vegas show . . . Sunday at 8 p.m. on HBO. C. Sissy Spacek and Alfre Woodard star in PICTURES OF HOLLIS WOODS, a 2007 Hallmark Hall of Fame production . . . Sunday at 9 p.m. on CBS. D. LAST LAUGH '07 STARRING LEWIS BLACK takes aim at the year's most notorious newsmakers . . . to quote TV GUIDE, "Look out Britney, Don Imus and Michael Vick: This is gonna hurt" . . . Sunday at 10 p.m. on COMEDY CENTRAL. Back To Top _________________________________________________________ 6. It takes all kinds I overhead one of the clerks recently at my local library, telling her boss the following: "I had to tell one of our patrons that she owed the library over $15 in fines. Among the late books: THE COMPLETE IDIOT'S GUIDE TO BEATING DEBT." Back To Top _________________________________________________________ 7. Websites A. As promised, here's one of the finest things I have ever come across on the Internet: http://youtube.com/watch?v=LnLVRQCjh8c I don't want to give it away until you've actually seen it, so let me just say that you should have something available to wipe your tears when you view it . . . and I'm NOT kidding here . . . also, viewing this will have a greater appreciation of all the blessings that you have in your life. Please feel free to share this with your children and grandchildren, too . . . you might want to forward it to others, too . . . as always, feel free to send the entire issue (emphasizing Section 7A) and when you do, invite your friends and colleagues to subscribe to BLAINESWORLD at no cost! B. To go to the opposite extreme, take this opportunity to view what might well be the world's worst job: http://youtube.com/watch?v=9ATH2gr4SDY I guarantee that it will make any past or present job you've had look great! C. BLAINESWORLD, the website, remains up and running . . . to view it, please click: http://www.blainesworld.net If you're ever in need of a quick laugh, go to "Newsletters" on the left, then "Past Issues" . . . click any number (particularly if you're a relatively new subscriber) and check Sections 3, 6 and 9 . . . so, for example, I did this for BLAINESWORLD #455 and revisited this true story: Proper attire Proper attire is required in the cafeteria at the University of Maine. To enforce that rule, the management posted this notice: "Shoes are required to eat in this cafeteria." Next to it, a student added, "Socks can eat wherever they want." Back To Top _________________________________________________________ 8. Computer tip The next time you get an error message on your computer, put it in quotes and then submit to Google or your favorite search engine . . . you'll be pleasantly surprised to find that suggestions will come back that you can use to correct problems yourself. To try this out, I used this error message: "Stop 0x00000077" . . . sure enough, when I went to Google, I got a bunch of helpful websites in return. Back To Top _________________________________________________________ 9. New procedures A sign in a Bank Lobby reads: "Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through teller machines, making it even easier for customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. Customers using these new machines are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts. After months of careful research, MALE and FEMALE procedures have been developed. Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender." MALE PROCEDURE: 1. Drive up to the cash machine and keep your car window down (that was open anyway as an arm rest). 2. Insert card into machine and enter PIN. 3. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw money. 4. Retrieve card, cash and receipt, then drive off. FEMALE PROCEDURE: 1. Drive up to cash machine. 2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine. 3. Set parking brake, put the window down. 4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card. 5. Tell person on cellphone you will call them back and hang up. 6. Attempt to insert card into machine. 7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car. 8. Insert card. 9. Re-insert card the right way. 10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page. 11. Enter PIN. 12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN. 13. Enter amount of cash required. 14. Check makeup in rear view mirror. 15. Retrieve cash and receipt. 16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside. 17. Write deposit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook. 18. Re-check makeup. 19. Drive forward 2 feet. 20. Reverse back to cash machine. 21. Retrieve card. 22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder and place card into the slot provided. 23. Give appropriate one-fingered hand signal to irate male driver waiting behind you. 24. Restart stalled engine and pull off. 25. Redial person on cell phone. 26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles. 27. Release Parking Brake. Back To Top _________________________________________________________ 10. A quote I like A Greek couple-dear friends of mine-made their first baby this year. "Come look," they said. I looked. What could I say? Most babies look like Winston Churchill without his cigar. Even the best ones look like Winston Churchill after a face-lift. This one looks like the daughter of Barbie and Ken. Perfect. That's what I told the parents. Men usually say, "Beautiful." Women usually say, "Cute." But I get very high points for saying, "Perfect." And not mentioning Winston Churchill.--Robert Fulghum in WHAT ON EARTH HAVE I DONE? (see also Sections 2, 4C and 11) _________________________________________________________ 11. Thought for the day The following is from Robert Fulghum's WHAT ON EARTH HAVE I DONE? (see also Sections 2, 4C and 10), a book I really liked as evidence by the fact that it has now been mentioned four times in this week's issue: Meanwhile . . . Some sense of being successful in life may lie in knowing which league to play in. If your dream of success means playing striker on a World Cup soccer team and you are short, chubby, and slow, you will die disappointed. Wrong league. If you are pleased to play goalie on a local playground team with other short, chubby, and slow people--and you have a wonderful time doing it, then you are a successful soccer player. Right league. And the same is true for any sport--tennis, baseball, volleyball, poker, or whatever--pick a league worthy of your abilities and flourish there. Or, as Epictetus said in the 4th century B.C.: “If you can fish, fish. If you can sing, sing. If you can fight, fight. Determine what you can do. And do that.” Likewise, some sense of being successful in life may lie in knowing on which scale you work best. For example, an astronomer is one whose mind can function on a cosmic scale. A physicist is one whose mind can handle the quantum scale. A theologian--a metaphysical scale. A historian deals with the long picture. A psychiatrist works with the deep picture. A cook or taxi driver works with the immediate situation. Poets and artists work on a very personal scale. Politicians--the public arena. Many die confused and unfulfilled because they spend a life trying to perform above their abilities and perspective--usually a matter of working on the wrong scale. Epictetus said, “Why worry about being a nobody when what matters is being a somebody in those areas of your life over which you have control, and in which you can make a difference?” Why am I telling you this? Two reasons. My 70th year begins this week, and I am in a reflective mood. And my thinking was provoked when I arrived in Crete this year and found on my desk a letter to me from a German scholar who had lived in my house for a time while I was away. (She has read my books and reads my web-site journal postings.) After expressing appropriate appreciation for my writing and the use of the house, she asked some hard questions: Why did I not address the political issues of our time, especially the actions of the present American government administration? Why did I not address the humanitarian issues of our day? Why was I not outraged as an American with the evil done on my behalf? Did I agree that might makes right, that the end justifies the means, and that God is on our side? How can I support the fundamental position of Zionist Israel? Did I really believe the American Way was the only Way? Did I have any real understanding of how America is perceived in the world now? How much hatred and contempt is felt? Why was I silent on these burning issues? Why did I not run for office and do something? Answer: It is a matter of league and scale. My mind works in the scale of the local, the daily, and the ordinary. Writing about that is the league in which I am competent. I tend to be simple-minded, plain-spoken, and optimistic. I attend to my corner of the world as best I can with the tools I have. Of course I know that evil and ugliness exists, as much now as ever. These get all the headlines. We all get the bad news. And I send money and vote and march in response. But I remain astonished at the good and lovely that exists. And most of it is free and readily available--if I stay open-eyed. Of course there is reason for pessimism. We shall all die. The earth will fall into the sun. Meanwhile . . . is the league and scale of the amateurs like me. I have not the skill to play professional sports. Wrong league. I have not the competence to be an astrologer, physicist, theologian, chef, historian, politician, psychiatrist, cook, or taxi driver. Wrong scale. Nor the talent to be a poet, musician, or artist. Nor writer of great literature or even thrillers or detective stories or political commentary. Not me. When people ask why don't I do this and this and this instead of that and that and that, I can only say that I am a man who has found his league and scale, who goes about trying to be awake to the news of the immediate ordinary world; to make sense of what I see; to pass it on with the implied question: have you seen what I see? Look! Don't miss the good stuff--that is my message. There. Not self-defense or apology. Just a statement of position. Meanwhile . . . I know what I can do. Meanwhile. . . I do it. Back To Top _________________________________________________________ 12. Advance planning department A. Alan Goldstein, a longtime friend and reader, is featured in a solo exhibit titled "Rock Paper Sand" running through Dec. 3 at Riverrun Gallery in Lambertville, NJ . . . for more information, please click: http://www.phillyburbs.com/pb-dyn/news/83-11262007-1446648.html B. MARK TWAIN'S LAST STAND will be performed by actor Alan Kitty on the second floor of the Princeton Public Library in Princeton, NJ, at 7 p.m. on Thursday . . . you can't beat the price: FREE! For more information, call 609.924.9529 or click: http://www.princetonlibrary.org C. WATCH ON THE RHINE continues at Actors' NET of Bucks County in Morrisville, PA, through December 2 . . . this gripping drama by Lillian Hellman will be watchable if for no other reason than to catch Tom Orr (one of my favorite local actors), who stepped in at the last minute when the actor slated to pay the Kurt Muller role dropped . . . for more information, call 215.295.3694 or click: http://www.actorsnetbucks.org D. Donna in New Jersey was kind enough to share the following memo she received from Brian Hughes, the effective County Executive for Mercer County, NJ: Mercer County is proud to sponsor Patriots' Week, the annual celebration of the importance of Mercer County in the birth of our nation. Patriots' Week 2007 will honor the Battles of Trenton and Gen. George Washington's brilliant coup against the feared Hessian mercenaries. From December 26 to December 31, the Trenton Downtown Association will coordinate the largest Revolutionary War festival in America. More than 50 events are scheduled and will include the Battles of Trenton re-enactments, lectures, puppet shows and other children's activities, Colonial teas, walking tours, bus tours, a Colonial church service, movies, art shows, Revolutionary sword fights, historical interpretations, colonial music, panel discussions, and a concert on an instrument designed by Ben Franklin rumored to drive men mad. For more information, visit: http://www.patriotsweek.com _________________________________________________________ PS. Please join me in praying that we soon get our remaining soldiers back from Iraq and that peace resumes in Israel . . . also, make it a great week! Back To Top ---------------------------------------------------------- SUBSCRIBE/UNSUBCRIBE INFORMATION To subscribe to this publication, please send an email to: bginbc@aol.com and put SUBSCRIBE in subject line . . . if you wish to unsubscribe, just send an email to same address and put UNSUBSCRIBE in subject line.
|
